75+ Poop Pick Up Lines To Impress Someone.

Poop Pick Up Lines

Poop Pick Up Lines: Have you ever wondered  can there be pick up lines using “poop” . If yes, don’t worry we’ve got you covered.

Here are some top Poop related Pick up lines which you can use to Impress someone  and show them your poop skill xD.

Best Poop Pick Up Lines

damn girl you shit with that ass.

Will you hold my drink while I go for a shit?

Look at the shitter on that critter.

If your ass was a Chinese restaurant, I’d have the poo-poo platter.

do you like finger painting?

“Was your ass forged by Sauron? Cause that shit looks precious.”

Did god just take a poop? Cause holy shit girl!

The universe doesn’t give a shit about you, but I do.


Poop is a crap palindrome.

Poop related Pick up lines
Poop related Pick up lines

Do you like bagels? Because you’re Bae-goals.

Are you fucking retarded? Because I think you’re special.

Are you a beaver cuz dam.

You can call me shit, cause I wanna be all up in that ass.

How do you get the bathroom unlocked in a hurry? With a doo-key.

What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? “I’m feeling really wiped.”

I need to buy a new toilet bowl. The one I have is full.

What do women and toilet paper have in common?
They both deal with a lot of crap.

Have you seen the movie Diarrhea?
It leaked, so they had to release it early.

Poop Pick Up Lines
Poop Pick up lines


Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
To get to the bottom.

Shity Pick Up Lines


Are you a Stephen King novel?
Because you thick as hell and scare the shit out of me.

What did you get when you mix castor oil with holy water?
A religious movement.

Love is like a fart.
If you have to force it, it’s probably crap.

Are your parents assholes?
Because you’re the shit.

Why did the lady stop telling poop jokes?
Everyone told her that they stink.

Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
To look for Pooh!

Hey girl I just shit my pants?
Mind if I get in yours

What do you call a planet that poops?

Are you constipated?
Because I wanna f*ck the shit out of you.

Wanna hear a poop joke?
Nah, they always stink.

Why did the man bring toilet paper to the party?
He’s a party pooper.

Funny Poop Pick Up Lines

I like toilets for two reasons.
Number one and number two.

Hey girl are you a toilet?
Because you look mighty fine to use right now.

What did one toilet say to the other?
You look flushed.

What do cows call poop?

Damn Subaru, you Impreza the shit out of me!

Why does Piglet always smell bad?
Because he plays with Pooh.

Two rolls of toilet paper walked into a bar.
One rolled out.

What’s the difference between good and bad toilet paper?
One is terrible, and one is tearable.

Hey baby I just shit my pants
Can I get in yours?

Why can’t you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom?
Because the “p” is silent.

People who tell you they’re constipated are full of crap.
Children are like farts.

Wanna hear a poop joke?
Nevermind. It’s too corny.

Dirty Poop Pick Up Lines

Excuse me, I just shit my pants.
Can I get into yours?

What’s your favorite cartoon?
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turdles.

Did you hear about the constipated composer?
He had problems with his last movement.


What’s the definition of surprise?
A fart with a lump in it.

Poop jokes aren’t my favorite.
But they’re a solid number two.

If pooping is the call of nature.
Is farting like a missed call?

What’s big, brown, and behind the wall?
Humpty’s dump.

Your own are just about bearable, but everyone else’s are horrendous.

What did the bottle of conditioner do to the toilet?

Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks.

What’s the best snack to eat while watching a movie that stinks?

What’s brown and firm?
The Brown Family Law Firm.

Hey girl are u a chocolate fondue?
Cause when I eat u out I get shit on my face.

Which movie is always the worst of the trilogy?
The turd one.

Where do bees go to the bathroom?
The BP station.

I bought a toilet brush yesterday, but I’ve gotta say.
I prefer toilet paper.

What do you call a magical poop?

Poop related Puns

If you were a bird and i was a bird
Would you fly around and shit on cars with me?

What did Spock find in the Enterprise toilet?
The Captain’s Log.

When does Denzel Washington have to hang out with the Rugrats?
Potty Training Day.

What do you get when you combine a Sham-Wow and a Snuggie?
A reason to pee in your pants.

How do you make a house made of dung smell better?
Use pooporri!

Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary?
It runs in your genes.

What is a piece of poop’s favorite dance move?
Poopin’ and locking.

People say love is the best feeling ever.
But I think finding a toilet when you’re having diarrhea is better.

When is the best time to go to the restroom?

Smooth Poop Pick Up Lines

I wish you were a septic tank,
Cause I want to pump the shit out of you.

I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday.
Then I had the biggest vowel movement ever.

Customer: “Waiter, what’s this fly doing in my soup?”
Waiter: “Pooping.”

Hey Girl I shit my pants, Can I get into yours?
Babe, you smell like shit, sorry!


Why doesn’t Chuck Norris ever flush the toilet?
He scares the poop out of it.

Why don’t people take their phones into the bathroom?
They don’t want to give away their IP address.

Damn girl are you an asshole?
Because I’m a piece of shit and should be inside of you

Have you seen the new movie, Constipated?
It hasn’t come out yet.

What do you call a bathroom superhero?
Flush Gordon.

What’s brown and sounds like a bell?

How do you help a man with constipation?
You pull the sh*t out of him.

What’s a surfer’s second greatest fear?
A shart attack.

What is a fart?
A lonely cry from an abandoned turd.

Why is the toilet a good place for a nap?
It’s in the restroom.

Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?
It got stuck in a crack.

What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea?
Salad shooter.

What do you get when you poop in your overalls?

What does Superman call his bathroom?
The Super bowl.

Stop making me laugh.You’ll make me puma pants.

Marshmallow Pick Up Lines
Why did the chicken cross the road?
The chicken next to him farted.


What do special effects designers call bowel movements?
They’re called 3-D farts.

What did the fast-food worker say to the toilet?
“Did you order a number two? I have one ready for you.”

My love for you is like diarrhea.
I can’t hold it in.

What did one toilet paper say to the next?
“You’re on a roll!”

Top Car Pick Up lines
What do you call a fairy in the bathroom?

It helps me stay in touch with my inner self.

Motivational Pick Up Lines

Thankyou For Reading Poop Pick Up Lines and  do comment down below your favorite poop related pick up lines.



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